“Yes” has to be honest. The same could be said for “No.”
A shaky response in truth is better than a confident answer in fear.
If the answer is not honest, truth will be seen in the response anyway.
This is true no matter the question but I think is more easily seen in the big questions.
One such big question has come up over and over and even more clearly the more I struggle with fear:
Do you trust Me?
If dumbfounded were an answer, it would be mine upon having this question presented in my thoughts clearly and quietly.
After all I have seen the Lord accomplish, after understanding as fully as I can who he is, for him to continue to ask this question of me – to continue to challenge me to answer – felt like a blow to the chest knocking the wind out of me as it knocked against my stubborn heart.
I find that I react in the “safety” of no. That is my initial response to just about any question whether that is in work or outside of work. No is my go-to. Yes scares me. What that could mean and look like.
Yes is a scary place to be.
Yes is a good place to be.
Reading through the psalms, I find clarity more often than not. David, I would confess, seems to share the most emotion with the Lord (aka, he’s probably one of the most dramatic writers, which I sometimes identify with and often more times than I would like). I find comfort in his pleas with the Lord.
Reminders in Psalm 37:
3 Trust in the Lord, and do good;
dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.
4 Delight yourself in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
5 Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him, and he will act.
6 He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
and your justice as the noonday.
7 Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;
fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way,
over the man who carries out evil devices!
That I am to delight in the Lord – to align my heart with the Lord’s – and be still and wait– that he is the one who takes care – he is the one who acts.
Reminders in Psalm 46:
God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way,
though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam,
though the mountains tremble at its swelling. Selah
4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy habitation of the Most High.
5 God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved;
God will help her when morning dawns.
6 The nations rage, the kingdoms totter;
he utters his voice, the earth melts.
7 The Lord of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
8 Come, behold the works of the Lord,
how he has brought desolations on the earth.
9 He makes wars cease to the end of the earth;
he breaks the bow and shatters the spear;
he burns the chariots with fire.
10 “Be still, and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!”
11 The Lord of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
Reminding me that he is here no matter what takes place around me and that he breaks the bow and shatters the spear – that he causes wars both far away and close to stop. Stop.
Rest in Psalm 62:
5 For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,
for my hope is from him.
6 He only is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress; I shall not be shaken.
7 On God rests my salvation and my glory;
my mighty rock, my refuge is God.
8 Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your heart before him;
God is a refuge for us. Selah
That I can rest in him – that he is a refuge. That he does not move and is not moved.
Reassurance in Psalm 73:
21 When my soul was embittered,
when I was pricked in heart,
22 I was brutish and ignorant;
I was like a beast toward you.
23 Nevertheless, I am continually with you;
you hold my right hand.
24 You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will receive me to glory.
25 Whom have I in heaven but you?
And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
26 My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strengthof my heart and my portion forever.
27 For behold, those who are far from you shall perish;
you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you.
28 But for me it is good to be near God;
I have made the Lord God my refuge,
that I may tell of all your works.
That even when I am not faithful, he remains faithful. Even when I question him, he continues to hold my hand. That even though I am weak in my flesh, he is my strength. That it is good to be near God.
And as many verses that I know of and can search out and rest in, Psalm 139 is one that constantly puts my life in perspective:
O Lord, you have searched me and known me!
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from afar.
3 You search out my path and my lying down
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before a word is on my tongue,
behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
5 You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is high; I cannot attain it.
7 Where shall I go from your Spirit?
Or where shall I flee from your presence?
8 If I ascend to heaven, you are there!
If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!
9 If I take the wings of the morning
and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
10 even there your hand shall lead me,
and your right hand shall hold me.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,
and the light about me be night,”
12 even the darkness is not dark to you;
the night is bright as the day,
for darkness is as light with you.
13 For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 If I would count them, they are more than the sand.
I awake, and I am still with you.
19 Oh that you would slay the wicked, O God!
O men of blood, depart from me!
20 They speak against you with malicious intent;
your enemies take your name in vain.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O Lord?
And do I not loathe those who rise up against you?
22 I hate them with complete hatred;
I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart!
Try me and know my thoughts!
24 And see if there be any grievous way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting!
That the Lord knows me – intricately – and planned for me and is concerned for me – how can I read this and not choose to worship and praise him? To respond in awe and adoration?
How can I not trust a God like this?